Category Archives: parenting

Coming in for a landing

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Right around the time Scorch was born, I learned about the phrase “helicopter parent” and I vowed I’d never been that mom.

Yeah- never say never. Now that Scorch is in school I total get that urge.

Since school started, Scorch has had on- again/ off-again issues with one of the boys in his class.  This little boy is either excluding Scorch from things OR not letting anyone else play with him and Scorch when the two of them are together.  Either way, Scorch comes home upset at least weekly over this.  When he’s being excluded his feeling are obviously hurt and he’s confused why this kid, who he considers a friend, is being mean.  When this child is excluding other kids, Scorch doesn’t get it either because he just wants to play with everyone.

To a 30-something, it doesn’t sound like a big deal. But to a 4 year old, this is a huge deal.

I wrestled with whether to mention this to his teachers.  Scorch is in a big class of 26 kids and while his teachers are astoundingly amazing, they aren’t omnipotent. But I don’t want to be that mom– the one who gets up in arms every time her precious snowflake is upset, the one who doesn’t let her kid figure it out on his own.

I ultimately did speak with his teachers and they were great and have taken immediate steps to help both boys with this. I think, in this case, I made the right decision to speak up.  Now I’m wondering if it would be weird if I sent Scorch to school with a recording of Stuart Smalley repeating “I’m Good Enough, I’m Smart Enough, and Doggone It, People Like Me!” over and over. That’s totally normal, right?

 

A Glimpse

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One of my favorite people in the whole world & dearest friends (hi, Heather!) and her husband adopted a 10 year old this past June. K is now 11 and one of the fiercest, fashionable kids around.

I don’t know many (any?) tweens, but  Heather and I talk daily online, so I get a glimpse into life with one.

And I’m scared.

Every parent knows about the big things to be worried about- drugs, sex, bullying. But I never thought about the little things. Like can you trust your kids to purchase a healthy lunch at school instead of gorging on pizza and ice cream? What about punishment- how do you punish your tween? And how do you reward them for good behavior? Where do you draw the line on clothing- sure it’s modest, but it isn’t weather appropriate or doesn’t fit or match.  When does your kid get a cell phone?

Give me temper tantrums & pre-school politics any day!

Knockin’ Heads

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The Hubs and I have slightly different parenting philosophies when it comes to the  kids rough housing.  I’m pretty laid back about it. As long as no one is in immanent danger of losing any teeth or they aren’t playing too rough out of anger, they can have at it.  Teaches ’em self defense as far as I’m concerned.

The Hubs freaks when the kids pull the couch cushions onto the ground and jumps on them.

I roll my eyes at him, because dude- the kids are 2 inches off the ground. What could happen??

Yeah. Thus far, the worst injury the kids have gotten at home is when the Bean tackled Scorch while they were jumping on those damn cushions and they both smacked their heads together and then on the ground. Thankfully they are both fine.

I honestly have no idea who this accident proves right (or wrong!).