Today was not a stellar day.
The day after I have a hard night with the kids, I feel guilty. Guilty that I yelled. Guilty that I can’t figure out how to manage the Bean better. Guilty that I don’t keep as calm as I want to. Guilty that the last thing my kids heard me say to them before bed was “Go to bed- I don’t want to hear an other peep from you!” Guilty that the Bean is going to read this blog in a few years and just see the negativity and not see the joy she brings to our lives. Just plain old guilty.
Then I called the car dealership about this random blinking light in my van. Turns out that random light means the air bag system in my car isn’t working. The cost to fix it could run as much as $4000. I almost cried. That’s a 4th of the total cost of the whole damn van!
Throw in lost car keys, running out of Hershey’s Syrup (a girl needs her chocolate milk!), a washer full of pieces of straw (don’t ask) and a few other minor insults and I decided today is simply not destined to be a good day.
Then reality slapped me in the face when I found out a friend of mine’s mother passed away. It wasn’t entirely unexpected, but still completely heartbreaking.
My worries? Sure- they are big in my world today, but in the grand scheme of things they are nothing. Money comes and money goes. The Bean will eventually go to sleep again (please God, let that be true). The keys will show up and the grocery store will stock Hershey’s Syrup again. My kids know I love them dearly and I really don’t think occasionally losing my cool is going to result in huge therapy bills for them. And the end of the day, I have a healthy, happy family- the rest is just minor details.