I’m never, ever taking you grocery shopping again.
I say that every week, yet every week I end up taking both you and Scorch because I’m too lazy to go on Friday night. This weekend I came well prepared. We hit up Dunkin Donuts before going and I got you and your brother a batch of Munchkins to eat. We got to the store early enough to ensure we could get one of the coveted “Car Carts”- the shopping cart with a car in front that you both can fit into. The lure of donuts + the car cart kept things going smoothly for the first portion of our trip.
Then you got bored, so you started leaning your head out of the cart. I kept reminding you to put your head in the cart so you don’t get hurt.
Do you see where this is going?
As we were strolling down the cleaning items aisle, an older man came barreling down towards us clearly not paying a bit of attention. So I quickly yank the cart (which is about a quarter wider then a normal cart) over to the side and park it to avoid a collision.
What I didn’t do is make sure your head was in the cart. And it wasn’t.
You screamed the store down. The end result was a scratch that started above your left eye brow, then picked up again on your nose and went under your other eye half way to your ear. I still have nightmares thinking about what would have happened if your eye was hit.
So I’m saying it now and I’m saying it publicly- I’m never taking you grocery shopping again.
Your mommy, who feels terrible still.