Category Archives: The Hubs

Jun6

Battle Ready

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Every time I’ve completely freaked out when my kids have vomited, I’ve always told myself that I would redeem myself as a mother and a caretakers when there was blood and/or broken bones.  I’d keep a calm head, I wouldn’t panic and I’d absolutely, positively not hide in my laundry room for 15 minutes at a time like I do now when someone pukes.

The only problem is that my self soothing was all theoretical as I had never had to test my theory with anything other then minor scrapes and bumps so far.  Until this weekend.

Saturday morning, I ran my first 5K (yeah!) and even made it back home in time for the last inning of Scorch’s t-ball game.  I was thrilled, the kids were thrilled and the Hubs was thrilled because he didn’t have to deal with Hurricane Bean all the while trying to help coach.  I watched Scorch and his team bat and then got pulled away when they were in the field because Bean and her buddies wanted to play their own toddler t-ball game and I was the star pitcher.  All was well until I heard Scorch cry out and one of the moms grabbed me and told me he got hit in the nose with the ball.  I turned in time to see the the Hubs scoop Scorch, with his bleeding face, up and run him to the bathroom.

It’s go time.  I’m ready. I have my water bottle to clean away the blood and a pack of tissues one of the other moms thrust at me as I ran by.  I’m very concerned, but I’m not panicked and best of all- I’m running towards my kid and his bodily fluids, not away from him.  Clearly, I am Super Mom.

Only problem is, I’m married to a former EMT and general do-gooder- just the kind of man who you want around when bad things happen, except during times you’re trying to redeem yourself.  The Hubs took charge and basically wouldn’t let me near Scorch until he assessed his wounds, cleaned him up and calmed him down.  And Scorch, bless his little heart, was totally and completely fine with that as Daddy had already proven himself in battle time and again.

Thankfully, Scorch is totally fine. The ball hit him in the lips, not the nose.  While his lips were swollen and cut, he didn’t need any stitches and kept all his teeth.  As for me, I’ll wait as long as it takes (hopefully a really really long time- like never) to prove myself again.

May31

Pickin’ My Ride

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Since the Hubs and I have been together, we have purchased a total of 4 cars and been gifted one (in a complicated family swap).   Each of the previous 4 car buying decisions have been easy.  The first two we bought while we were dating, so really the other person didn’t have much say in the matter.  I ended up with a brand new Neon right after college and he got a used Ford Thunderbird.  Neither were the prettiest of cars, but both served us really well when we moved to Maryland and were as cheap as cars could be (combined car payment was $300 a month!).

When we moved back to NY, we quickly realized that his rear-wheel drive car and my tiny tin can weren’t going to cut it during the long winters- especially given we live in an area called the Snow Belt.  So we went looking for 4-wheel drive SUVs back in 2004.  We had grand expectations until we saw the price tag that came with the really huge SUVs and eventually settled on a Jeep Cherokee.  Really, the car buying process was easy as we both knew and agreed upon what we wanted.  And we loved the car- it drove great, looked sporty and was safe.  Best of all, it was  big enough to accommodate Scorch when he came along in 2006 and the Bean when she was born in 2008.

Too bad I got into a major accident in 2009 and totaled the thing (something the Hubs still like to remind me of).  For 13 months after that, we were a one car family- driving the 2001 van we were gifted from my family.  The family roadster was a great vehicle, but it had seen better days even before we got it.  But it served us well until it died one morning in March of 2010 and the reality of having 1 car when you lived in the middle of nowhere and  had to get a kid to school and one person to work really sunk in.  Thankfully the van was revived, but we knew we had to get a new car ASAP.  Again, the decision was pretty easy- with two growing kids, we couldn’t deny the ease of having a van, so we bought another van- just a  newer model with a lot less miles.

The Hubs manhood took a severe beating that day.

Fast forward 14 months and our old van is really dying this time and we’re in the market for a new car.  The Hubs was adamant that this car not be another van, so we went looking at SUVs.  I thought we had decided on what we wanted, but I was clearly wrong given how our shopping went today.

I was stressing safety and passenger room- how having a 3rd row would really be great when we were driving around the kids and their friends.  I looked at the all the extra’s- some of these cars were loaded with remote starters and heated seats- niceties we’ve never had before.  The Hubs couldn’t have cared less. He looked at the SUVs I liked and told me they were chick cars- really not what he had in mind.  So after excusing ourselves from our sales guy, we had to walk away to actually have an argument about what exactly we were looking for.

Turns out the Hubs wanted a pick up truck.

Given how silly I thought the idea was when you take into account our lifestyle, I was damn proud of myself for agreeing to check out a few.  Thankfully after looking at a few and realizing that no, not even with a extended cab, a pick up truck doesn’t make sense we came to some sort of compromise and narrowed things down.

I think.

Our next shopping trip will tell us that for sure.  In the mean time, I’m going to be looking online lusting after all the extra’s I won’t get so my husband can feeling tough and manly while driving our two kids around.

 

May26

Love Thursday: Lots to Love

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You’ll have to forgive me for not being able to come up with coherent post tonight.  It stormed last night, which meant I was up with Crazy, our dog, for 2 hours.  I’m tired- so let’s talk about the random things I’m loving right now:

1) The fact that So You Think You Can Dance starts back up today! That show is my guilty pleasure for summer!

2) The book Little Princes: One Man’s Promise to Bring Home the Lost Children of Nepal   I started reading this last night and can’t put it down- really well written and an amazingly compelling story.

3) This hot weather (which I will love even more when the Hubs puts in our air conditioning).

4) Shopping for a new-to-us car. I love car shopping- the research, the negotiating, the fun of figuring out what to get!  We are looking for mid-sized SUVs with a 3rd row if anyone has any suggestions!  The key- needs to be around or under $20K to stay within our budget.

5) That fact that I get to see Red, TBO & Baby Lala this weekend for Baby L’s baptism!  We’re spending all day Saturday with family, I have a pretty dress and my kids will get to have a ball with their cousins.

6) We’re finally thisclose to getting resolution on the Hub’s job situation- cannot wait for that!

7) The Hubs went back to work after being so sick today. Love that man, but it was time for him to get out of the house.

What are you loving today?

May24

Falling like Dominos

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On Saturday we belated held Scorch’s birthday party.  We had to delay it a while because of the Virus from Hell – something that Scorch was not happy about.  Have you ever tried explaining to a 5 year old that he is not having his birthday party (read: not getting presents) for weeks because of an illness?  I don’t recommend it.

But finally, finally everyone in my house was healthy and Party Day dawned hot and sunny.  Scorch had a great t-ball game earlier in the day, the kids took great naps and the guest all arrived on time.  We had a fantastic evening full of family, friends, great food, cake and, yes, presents.  By the time everyone left around 9:30, I was happily exhausted.  Just as my Mother-in-Law, the Hubs and I were heading to bed, the Hubs said, “I don’t feel good.”

Are. You. Kidding?

I quietly said a quick prayer that the Hubs simply drank or ate too much and that was that.  It had been 5 full days since anyone in my house was sick- it couldn’t possibly be the Virus from Hell, right?  Wrong.  The Hubs started getting sick at 11:30 and kept going at least once an hour for 5 hours.

Now, that is awful for the Hubs- I felt terrible for him.  But, really, I felt more sorry for me and my mother-in-law (who was staying with us for the weekend) because the Hubs is the loudest puker *ever.*  There is absolutely no sleeping in a house this small when the Hubs is getting sick unless you’re in your own room with the door closed and a sound machine on, which the kids were.  But my mother-in-law and I weren’t so lucky, so we got to experience exactly what the Hubs was going through.  He’s so loud that Crazy, our dog, was freaking out.  She thought it was thunder every time the Hubs got sick, so we had to sedate her to get her through this ordeal.

The Hubs had my pity all through out the night, but I’m sorry to report he didn’t have my patience. I found myself thinking about the cost of hotel rooms (for either him or us, I didn’t care), asking the Hubs to go down in the basement with Crazy, the cats and our tiny speck of a half bathroom that Hubs barely fits into to get sick and, finally, smothering the Hubs when he got back to bed to put us all out of our misery.  But, because I’m clearly Wife of the Year material, I didn’t do any of the above and we all got through this.

Here we are 3 days out and the Hubs is still wiped out- he hasn’t left the house since Saturday.  I’m obsessively following him around with my Clorox Wipes, wiping down everything he’s touched.  It’s been 2 weeks since the Virus from Hell hit this house and I’m still standing and I intend to keep in that way. Wish me luck.

May17

Be Careful What You Wish For

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Two weeks ago, the Hubs and I left on 4.5 day road trip down to VA and NC to spend some time with family and friends and attend a much anticipated wedding.  I was so excited about this trip- the Hubs and I love road trips, we travel well together and we were going to see a lot of people we love.  It wasn’t a the most romantic or exotic of trips, but- hey, it was time away just the two of us and we were running with it.  The trip was fantastic and we so much fun!

The only rain cloud hanging over my head was the timing of an upcoming business trip- we arrived back home late on Sunday and I had to leave for a 3 days business trip to TX 18 hours later.  Normally I love traveling for business. I work from home, so I always enjoy seeing my coworkers, eating out and sleeping uninterrupted on the company’s dime. But this time because both trips were back to back, I was less then thrilled.  This was my longest time away from my kids and I knew I was going to miss them terribly and was feeling all sorts of guilty wishing I could spend more time with them. But I sucked it up, enjoyed my time in TX and very happily arrived the airport 2 hours early for my flight home. But it wasn’t meant to be.

The flight was delayed by more then 4 hours due to bad weather in Dallas. The delay caused me to miss my connecting flight in Newark, NJ.  After some scrambling when I was in TX, I found a hotel in Newark to stay at until I could catch the next flight home in the morning.  I think the hotel, a Hilton, was nice- but considering I only spent 4.5 hours in it (4.3 of which were spent sleeping), I can’t be entirely sure.  However, motherhood and all it’s lack of sleep prepared me well and I arrived back at the airport at 6 am smelling as fresh as I could be in the same clothes I’d been wearing for 24 hours (checked luggage- with all my clothes- couldn’t leave the airport for security reasons).

After I checked into my flight, I called home.  The Hubs answered with a “If you’re calling to tell me your flight is delayed I’m going to lose it.”  Hmmm…not the greeting I expected.  Turns out the Bean was up the whole night before throwing up every hour which meant no sleep for the Hubs and the Bean.  Quite honestly, at that point, my delay seemed like God sparing me from what I hated most, so I was almost cheerful as I waited for my 8 am flight. I got myself a nice breakfast, I enjoyed my book and I savored the last hour of me-time I had before descending back into the House of Vomit.

And thank God I did.  Since I got home last Thursday, I haven’t left the house for longer then 2 hours at a time and the time I have been home I’ve had a child draped over me.  The Bean was sick Wednesday night through Saturday night.  She finally started to perk up on Sunday just in time for Scorch to catch the bug and spend all Sunday night into Monday throwing up.  People- I was the one who got up with him the first time he woke  up feeling poorly.  I didn’t realize what was coming, he didn’t realize what was coming and it was ugly.  I’m still patting myself on the back for not running out of this house in horror.  And it didn’t stop for 17 hours.  That poor kid was leveled and the Hubs and I were walking Zombies.

Thankfully we have gotten past the puking part (please God, let it be over) and we’re just into the part of the virus where Scorch has a high fever and can fall asleep anywhere. Like in the bath, like he did today.  The Bean is completely back to normal and making us all freaking crazy. I called Mary, our nanny, this morning and begged her to take the Bean somewhere- anywhere- today for a few hours before I completely lost my mind.  Beaner didn’t sleep well for whatever reason last night, which turned her in to raging psychopath all day long.  She’d rain down the wrath of avenging angels  on your head if you didn’t give her the yogurt covered pretzels exactly how she asked for him.  And if you didn’t sit on the couch next to her just right? May heaven help you, because she had no pity for your stupidity and lack of mind reading abilities.

So, I wished for more time with my kids and I got it.  It’s just not exactly how I pictured it and frankly all of us are too tired, too ill or too sick of each other to enjoy much of it.

Mar2

Battle of Wills

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The Hubs is one of the most stubborn people I know. He’s right, you’re wrong and that is all there is to that.  On top of that, The Hub’s job also puts him in a position of authority. He’s very used to people telling people what to do and having them hop to.  Those traits serve him very well both professional and personally. Except for when they are reflected back at him through his kids.

Dinner tonight was a low key affair, so the kids ate sitting on the bar stools in the kitchen while the Hubs sat at the table behind them.  Beaner was sitting on her knees and wasn’t very steady so the Hubs asked her to please sit on her bum so she didn’t fall off the stool.

She ignored him.

He called her name again and repeated his request.  Beaners squared her little jaw and continued to ignore him.

I tried to intervene but  The Hubs asked me to let him take care of it, so I backed off while keeping my eyes on the Bean.  He repeated his request one more time, this time telling her if she doesn’t answer him, she will be going to timeout.

She  lifted her hiney in the air and settled it very carefully and very purposefully back on her feet, sitting on her knees still.

Honest to God, I thought the Hubs head was going to explode as he picked her up and carried her to time out.

I do believe he’s met his match!

Feb15

Sick Bed

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Last night at dinner, the Bean didn’t eat her bread.  This alarmed me greatly as this child would live on bread and butter if you let her.  Then she turned down her Valentine’s Day cupcake.  I knew right then and there she was sick.  When she asked to go to bed and wanted me to put her down instead of the Hubs, I figured the world was ending.

I kept the baby monitor right by me all evening and night waiting for the blow I knew was coming.  But all I heard was silence. So I got up and out of the house by 5:15 to head to the gym and didn’t give the Bean’s health a second thought.

When I got home, the Hubs was rinsing out the bath tub- the Bean had gotten sick.  I asked where she was and he told me she was laying in my bed.  I have to admit- I had conflicting thoughts about this.  My first thought was naturally hoping she feels better. But my second was fervently praying she didn’t get sick in my bed or worse yet on me.

After draping myself with a towel or four, I climbed into my bed with the Beaner for some cuddling. I noticed there was a towel already laid down under her and I mentally gave the Hubs props for thinking ahead.  While Beaner clearly didn’t feel well, it seems like getting sick was a one and done deal so I slowly peeled off my layers of protective towels as the morning went on (the puke bucket, however, stayed within arms reach all day long).

The Hubs called to check in shortly after I put Beaner down for her nap. After I gave him the status update, I thanked him for putting the towel down on our bed just in case.

The Hubs: “Just in case what?”

Me: “Just in case the Bean got sick in our bed after you cleaned her up.”

The Hubs: “Heather- how do you think I knew she was sick? She threw up in our bed.”

Me: “Let me get this straight. She puked, you cleaned her up, changed her- then you put a towel over the mess on our bed and laid her back down in it?!”

The Hubs: “It was only a little bit of puke- what’s the big deal?”

*sigh*

***********

Thankfully the Bean is feeling better as of this evening. Not nearly as clingy- which is a blessing for us all. Scorch, on the other hand, left the house for an hour this evening looking completely normal and came back home with a raging case of pink eye.  So I’ve traded in the fun of wrestling my daughter to get medicine in her last week to wrestling my son to get eye drops in him.   The fun never stops ’round these parts!

Feb14

My Favorite Valentine

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I don’t talk about the Hubs here very often.  He’s pretty private and I try to respect that as much as possible.  So I’ll keep this short and simple.

Marriage can be hard- anyone who tells you differently lives a much more charmed life than I do.  Moves, demanding jobs, infertility, miscarriages, raising two kids, owning two businesses on top of our normal 9-5 jobs- all those things take a toll on a relationship. It’s easy to start taking each other for granted, to put everything else first except each other.  And the Hubs and I have been guilty of that.

But at the end of the day, we love each other deeply.  We fight for each other and stand by each other.  We know that our marriage and our family is our top priority.  Neither one of us is given to sweeping gestures and declarations of love. Instead, we show each other our love through cars warmed up and scraped off on a cold winter’s morning. By remembering each others favorite food when we surprise the other one with takeout.  By DVRing random movies we think the other person may like. By asking each other every day how the others day was and ending every phone conversation with an “I love you.”

I’m very lucky to be married to the man that I am.  Our good days vastly outweigh our bad ones and when things do get crazy, the Hubs is the one I want to face every day with.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

Jan18

The Sucker

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After a couple weeks of not being around as much as he’d like due to work, the Hubs has been home this past week for dinner and bedtime for the kids every night.  It’s been great- I’ve been cooking, we’ve been having family meals with all 4 of us and I have a someone with me when I’m putting the kids to bed.

Please note, I didn’t say I had “help” putting the kids to bed.  Help isn’t a word I’d use.  The Hubs isn’t helpful at this particular role at all.  Especially when it comes to the Bean- that little girl has the Hubs wrapped around her finger about 10 times over.

Our routine for both kids typically is a teeny-tiny cup of milk, 2 books, potty/teeth brushing, another short book, prayers, a song and bed. Easy as can be and when I’m flying solo each kid’s bedtime (usually spaced 30 mins apart) takes about 20 minutes total.  But now that the Hubs is home- and feeling guilty for not being around much last few weeks- the Bean’s bedtime is pushed back until Scorch’s and the whole thing takes well over 45 mins.  And it’s all the Bean’s fault.  She knows the power she holds over the Hubs- she knows darn well that her request for one more game/book/story/song is going to be agreed to without a second thought, especially when she adds in that extra sweet “Please, daddy? Please?”

As soon as I hear those words, I know the routine has once again been thrown out the window because the Hubs is a sucker for those cute pleas and more fun with the kids.

So I take a deep breath and put a smile on my face  even if I’m gritting my teeth because you know what? These times are precious and they won’t last long.  Pretty soon all the Hubs and I will get is a peck on our cheeks and a “‘Night!” from the kids as they put themselves to bed.  My schedule and routine may be blown to hell, but the kids are going to bed with a smile on their lips and giggles echoing down the hallway.  At the end of the day, you can’t ask for much more then that!

Jan17

How I Met Your Father

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13 years ago yesterday the Hubs and I went on our first date.

We actually met about 12 days prior to our first date- at Victoria’s Secret of all places.  I worked there for 2 year during college- it was a fun gig! I always enjoyed working retail and trust me, we had some interesting customers at Vicky See’s. One day I greeted a customer, the Hubs, waking into the store as I was walking out for my break.  I noticed immediately what a cutie he was- but let’s face it, while Vicky See’s is a great place to work, it’s not a great place to pick up guys. If he’s in there shopping for anyone else other then his significant other, he’s most likely a little too odd for me and if he is shopping for his significant other, then he’s off limits.

I get back from my break and ask one of my co-workers if she saw the cutie who came in as I was leaving.  Turns out the cutie was a friend of hers from college and he dropped by to say hi and I caught his eye.  Well, well, well…

The Hubs came back in the next day to ask me out one night that weekend.  But I had plans every night- I was getting my wisdom teeth out on Monday and it was my last weekend of freedom before college started up again. I did tell him that my friends and I would be at a local bar/dance club on Saturday night if he wanted to join us and didn’t really give him a second thought.

Saturday night arrived and I went out to the bar with my friends. To my surprise, the Hubs showed up as well! We talked for a few, but frankly I was too interested in having fun with my friends to pay him much attention. He was a virtual stranger and it’s really hard to make small talk when the music is so loud.  About an hour into our night, a bar fight broke out (high class place, I know) so my friends and I opted to leave.  I made sure to say goodbye to the The Hubs before I left- telling him to have a good night!

Too bad he thought I told him to have a nice life.

The next day I got a call from our mutual friend asking why I was so stinking rude to the Hubs the night before. She was livid and I was confused.  Once she told me what he thought I said, we cleared things up and I asked her to please give the Hubs my number so I could apologize.  We talked later that night and found out we actually had a lot in common- my interest was definitely starting to peak.

But the next day, Monday, I got my wisdom teeth removed surgically.  I’ll spare you all the details, but suffice to say I couldn’t really talk until Wednesday even though the Hubs called every day to check on me.  When we finally did talk he asked me out for that Saturday and I agreed- warning him I still looked like a chipmunk and had bruises up my cheeks from surgery.  He said he didn’t care so we agreed to meet at a minor league hockey game.

On the way to the game I found out that the couple we were supposed to be double dating with canceled on us, so it was just the two of us.  I called my best friend and made her promise to call me half way through the game so I could bail if things weren’t going well (forgive me, I was 19!).  However, the date went wonderfully and I forgot to keep my cell phone handy so my very inventive friend called the Arena to have me paged.  Smooth, right?

After the game was over, we decided to grab a late dinner so we went to Applebees.  There we ran into the Hubs cousin, SuperCop, who – surprise!- was also a guy I dated for a while four years prior. That was both awkward and awesome because no one can break the ice better then SuperCop. We ended up having a great time out despite the fact that I completely forgot that salt + open wounds in your mouth = me crying terribly halfway through dinner.

Writing this all out now- my lukewarm reaction to him, “Have a nice life!”, my bruised & swollen face, his cousin who is my ex and my crying spell because I’m a dumbass, it’s astounding that the Hubs asked me out again.  But he did and I said yes and 13 year later we took the kiddos back to see the same AHL hockey team we saw on our first date.  I love it when life comes full circle!