Author Archives: Heather

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About Heather

I adore my family, writing, books, cats, lazy mornings in bed, and chocolate. I'll never say no to breakfast for dinner, long talks with friends and lazy summer days at the pool with family. My life is often crazy, always awesome and one I'm so happy to be living! My side hustle is editing and proofing work. Find out more at https://heathercaryn.com/
Oct13

Playing Grown Up

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I’m a bit of an oddity for a few reasons.  First, I work full time in my house- I’ve been telecommuting for the past 8 years. Second, I really, really like my job.

Before kids, working from home meant sleeping until 8:20, rolling out of bed and starting work at 8:30. Now it means working a full day from 6 – 8:30 am getting the kids up, taking Scorch to school, then coming back again by 8:20, handing off the Bean to our amazing nanny, and then starting my official work day.  There are some mornings when starting work is my break. 😉

I’m incredibly lucky with this arrangement and know it. I love my job and my coworkers; I get to feel productive every day and bring in a pay check all while hearing my kids play upstairs. Some people take coffee breaks, I take hugs & kisses breaks. When the kiddos were little, I could stop to nurse them or calm them down. Now I can kiss boo-boos and hear about school days between conference calls.

But I do miss, on occasion, getting dressed for work and interacting with adults everyday. Which is why I love quick business trips! I get to see some of my favorite people, stay in a hotel much nicer then what we stay in as a family, eat dinners out at places that don’t have a kids menu and just get to be Grown Up. Conversations don’t revolve around Preschool Politics or potty training progress at the dinner table. I get to be Heather instead of simply Scorch & Bean’s Mom and, sometimes, that’s awesome.

I just hope my coworkers didn’t notice the crayon marks all over the top of my laptop.

Oct10

Season of Colors

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I was never, ever going to live this close to home.

Growing up, all I could think about doing was getting out. Out of a place where you couldn’t go to the gas station without knowing someone. Out of the place where it snows 5-7 months a year. Out of the place where there was nothing to do and limited opportunities. Just OUT.

After graduating college, the Hubs and I moved to the DC area for his job. We loved it there- the shorter winters were a huge bonus. If we were ever bored, it was our fault for not finding something to do. We hit all the museums, drove to the beach on the weekends, went into the city for dinner, went to see the O’s play in Baltimore.

But it wasn’t home. People didn’t say hello or thank you for holding the door for them. They didn’t look you in the eye or make small talk. Nobody said “God Bless You” when you sneezed.  So when the Hubs job offered us a transfer back an hour from home, we jumped on it.

We’ve been back a little over 8 years now and I can’t imagine living anywhere else- especially this time of year.

Oct7

Surprise! Or Not?

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I’m going to be an aunt again! My sister, Red, and her husband, The Bearded One, are expecting their first baby and my family couldn’t be more thrilled even if The Bearded One is the father.**

They recently had their Big Ultrasound- the one that lasts forever where ever inch of your babe is measured and remeasured to make sure everything is as it should be. It’s also when couples can find out the baby’s gender.

We didn’t find out the gender of either of my kids prior to their birth. Thankfully, The Hubs and I were in complete agreement about this- we both wanted that big “It’s a…” reveal after the baby was born.  Because both of my pregnancies were high risk, I had well over 20 ultrasounds with each kid so the temptation was there, but I’m so glad we waited!

Anyhow, Red didn’t want to find out the gender of their baby, but The Bearded One did.  So that is what they did- he knows what they are having and she doesn’t.

That so wouldn’t have flown in my house.  The Hubs would have tortured me with that knowledge- dropping hints, teasing me with possible slip ups and generally making my life miserable.  Kudos to Red and The Bearded One for being a hell of a lot more mature then we are!

**I kid, I kid! 🙂

Oct6

On Growing Up

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Bean doesn’t want to be a baby anymore. Everything is done her way, by her. “Me do” is a constant refrain in our house. Putting on her clothes, getting her diaper, going potty, washing her hands, brushing her teeth, feeding herself, coloring, playing, going anywhere.

Everything takes 10x as long as it should because she wants to do it herself. Coats get put on upside down and more then half of her dinner ends up in her lap because not only does she want to feed herself, she wants to do it with adult utensils. Most of the time it’s adorable; except for when you’re in a hurry. Then it’s just annoying.

That is why I cherish bedtime- the one time a day where you can see the baby that once was in the way Bean wants to cuddle while we sing our good night songs.

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Scorch is old enough now that he cares what people think.  We were at a family gathering a few weeks back and he bumped his head on the counter and everyone turned to make sure he was OK.  He put on a tough face, then walked calmly out of the room and burst into tears- not because he was hurt but because he was so embarrassed that people were looking at him.  Then he was worried people were going to think he was a baby for crying.

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Nobody warns you before you have kids all the millions of ways they’ll break your heart simply by just growing up.

Oct5

Martha Doesn’t Live Here

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I’ve already confessed one domestic shortcoming, might as well confess an other.

I don’t like to cook. At all- unless I have the time to spare,  like on a Sunday afternoon.  Weeknights between 5, when I get off work, and 6, when we eat,  is not my favorite time to cook.

That said, I do it 4-5 nights a week as our budget doesn’t allow for a personal chef (although I’m saving for one!) or eating out all the time. I have a staple of recipes I pull from ranging from chicken parm to breakfast for dinner but my list of go-to dishes needs to expanded, that is for sure. During the summer it’s easy- throw some meat on the grill, toss up a salad and slice up some watermelon.  Cooking when it’s 50 degrees out (and getting colder every day) and raining isn’t as simple.

Tonight I decided to branch out a bit. I got an easy recipe for marinated steak tips that sounded good, so I figured I’d throw in some baked potatoes and make up a salad and everyone would be happy.  I was feeling pretty cocky and even posted about how I was channeling my inner Martha Stewart on Facebook.

The steak turned out great- even the kiddos loved it! But the potatoes? Not so much. How does one screw up wrapping potatoes in foil and letting them bake?!?  I think I undercooked them even though they baked for 1 hr and 20 min because we couldn’t eat them.

Combine that with my inability to hard boil an egg properly and I think it’s pretty clear I’d fail Cooking 101.

Oct4

The Invention of Lying

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I’ve read in a couple magazines lately that when your toddler / pre-schooler  lies it’s actually a good thing- it shows  foresight, thought and intelligence.

That sounds all well and good until it’s your kid who is lying.

Scorch is going through a phase now (please, God, let it be a phase) where you say white, he says black. Yesterday he did something that got him in a bit of trouble. Nothing terrible, but he got talked to by the Hubs and I. You could see the panic in his eyes and suddenly he blurts out that the Bean was to blame. The problem is that the Bean had been strapped into her car seat while all this went down.

He was absolutely insistent that she was the culprit. He even came up with a story on how she wormed herself out of her car seat and got into trouble, then got herself back into her car seat all without us noticing.  Have I mentioned lately that the Bean is 2?!  Scorch didn’t cry, yell or get upset. That was his story and he stuck to it.

I keep reminding myself that this is a sign that Scorch is smart- scary smart. Not that he’s a psychopath. 😉

Oct3

Chatter

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While I was in my room earlier today, I overheard the kiddos talking to each other.

First Scorch tried to teach Beaner how to color within the lines (total fail- she’s only 2).

Then he tried to explain to her why we had to cheer for the Yankees & the Giants today (because those are the teams Daddy,  Papa & Grandpa cheer for, of course).

Then their conversation turned heavy. Scorch tried to explain Heaven to Bean (it is a place in the sky that you can’t see because the clouds get in the way that you go to when you’re really, really old. Bean really didn’t care).

Scenes like that play out every day in my house- the two kids talking to each other about anything and everything.

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After all the struggles we had to have Scorch, I wasn’t sure if I wanted a second child. Scorch was (is) perfect in just about every way and our family was in a great spot.  Two jobs, a small business, and one kid- things were more then manageable!  The Hubs & I hemmed and hawed over when- if- to have another kid. When Scorch was 2? 3?

And then I found out I was pregnant. Accidentally. Unexpectedly. Amazingly.

I can’t imagine how quiet our house would be if there wasn’t two of them.

Sep30

Love Thursday: Imperfections

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I’ve always considered myself an optimist and have very little time for negative people. I always look on the bright side- life is so much more fun when you see the good instead of the bad. So it’s no surprise I adore Karen Walrond’s blog– she’s got an amazing outlook on life and her photography skills turn me green with envy. Weekly she does a Love Thursday post and offers an invitation to her readers to share something- or someone- that they love. This week she takes it a step further and asks that we share our imperfections- with a reminder that because of, not in spite of, these imperfections we’re worthy of love.

So here goes mine.

I’m incredibly laid back (some may say lazy) about decorating our home. Curtains, matching kitchen towels, even holiday decorations- who needs them? I’d much rather decorate with framed photos, Pre-school art projects, books and use Easter themed dish towels in September. I’m envious of friend’s perfectly pulled together homes, but taking the time (and money) to buy all those little things just isn’t a priority for me. 99% of the accessories in my house are a result of gifts or The Hubs nagging.

But I’m still worthy of love.

Sep29

Danger is Her Middle Name

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The Hubs and I often joke that Bean will be responsible for every gray hair on our heads.  Only we’re not really joking.

Today I found her standing on top of the kitchen counters trying to climb up the cupboards.

In the past I’ve found her on the kitchen table trying to jump up so she could dangle from the hanging light. Standing on the back of the couch. Trying to jump down from three steps high.  Heading straight for the tallest slide at the playground.

She walks into Scorch’s classroom daily like she belongs there. When we drop him off at school she settles right in to color with the rest of the kids.  When it’s time to pick him up, she’s crawling into the middle of Circle Time signing and singing away with the kids. When we’re at the playground, she picks out the most daring kid there and tries to copy their every move never mind that they’re 5 times older then she is.

The Bean does it all gleefully and without a second thought.  When you tell her no she doesn’t throw a fit, she just ignores you. She knows what she wants to do and to hell with us and our worries.

Anyone know where to buy a full sized suit made out of bubble wrap? Etsy? Ebay? We’re desperate!

Sep27

Touched Out

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When I was pregnant with Scorch I read about new mom’s being “touched out.” Essentially they spent all their time carrying, rocking, feeding and being used as a pillow by their newborn so they got to the point where they didn’t want to be touched anymore, by anyone.

I never felt that way with either kids when they were little- but I do now.

I adore Scorch, that should go without saying. But the boy wants to be touching me All The Time.  Sitting on my lap. Hugging me. Kissing me a gazillion times over and over and OVER.  If I sit down, he’s crawling over me. If I’m standing up, he wants to be held. If we’re reading on the couch together, he’s kissing my cheek or my hand or draped over me. If I’m trying to help him with something, he’s putting his hands on my face, my head, my shoulders, my arms- poking, prodding, pulling, pushing, constantly touching.

He’s making me nuts.

I never, ever, EVER want to tell my kid to stop with the affection. My extended family hugs and kisses when we say hello and goodbye and we touch each others arms when we’re deep in conversation- physical affection is key in my life. But this is more then just affection- Scorch knows it can be too much and does it now just to make me crazy; giggling the whole time as I’m dodging his octopus arms while I’m helping him tie his shoes.  He even started with the “I’m not touching” you as his little hands hovered around my face.

I may lose my ever-lovin’ mind here soon.