Category Archives: Bean

Sep3

The First Day

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Dear kiddos-

Happy first day of school! For the first time ever, you started school on the same day. That means the Bean is Big now, which means I may have gotten teary-eyed leaving you both at school. Never mind that you both have been going to this school since you were 3 and that the Bean literally only moved up a floor, it was a Big Moment.

In typical fashion, when we got to school Scorch, you were off like a shot playing with your friends and ready to pick up where you left off in June. Bean, you were little more shy and reserved. You stuck to my hip until you had to step away and once you did, you were fine. By the time I left, you were both smiling and back in your groove.

New shoes!

I swear, my kid’s legs are clean- they are just bruised like crazy. Why? Who knows.

So, 3rd grade and 1st grade. How is that possible? I’m so excited for you both this year- it’s going to be great. Don’t ask me how I know that- I just do, I’m your mom. Like every year, I have some hopes for you. Want to know what they are? Of course you do…

> I hope that you have fun. At the end of the day, I hope you enjoy every aspect from math to reading to technology to recess. School should be *fun.* I know school can be a pressure cooker (especially for you, Scorch in 3rd grade) but don’t let that get to you. Stay enthusiastic and keep perspective.

> I wish you kindness. Kindness towards others but also kindness towards yourself. No one is perfect so cut yourself, your teachers and your friends some slack.

> I wish you courage. Be strong kiddos and know your worth. Stand up for yourself and those who can’t, or won’t, stand up for themselves.  Remember right from wrong and know that right will always win, even if it doesn’t seem like it.

> I hope that you learn discipline. (I’m looking at you, Scorch.) Keep track of your things, stay organized and take responsibility for yourself. We’ll help, of course- but it’s time to step up, little man.

> I wish you curiosity and love of learning. Seriously- not everything will be your cup of tea (see me + math) but never stop wondering why things work and how your teachers got that answer. Ask questions. Ask a million questions until you have answers that satisfy you. Want to know things, children – it’s an amazingly huge world and the possibilities are endless.

> I hope you have friends. Lots and lots of friends. The only way you’ll get these friends is by being a good friend. Cliche, but true. So be nice, be friendly, be polite and be open to everyone you meet.

Good luck, kiddos! This is going to be amazing!

Love,

Mom

 

 

Jul11

6!

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Dear Bean-
How is it that you’re 6 already? 5 still sounds little-ish. But 6? Six is old. You’re old. How is that possible? It’s hard for me to wrap my head around you being older because you’re still pocket size. You weigh 40 lbs soaking wet, so it’s easy to pick you up and fling you around. While you may not always like to do it, you’re still bit-sized enough to cuddle with ease. Here’s hoping you’ll always be.

5 was an astounding year for you. You rocked Kindergarten! You made new friends and you had a blast. I can count on one hand the amount of times you cried at school- usually because you were tired. This is a huge contrast to pre-K when every day was a sobfest at drop off.  You learned how to *read* this year. So now you read anything and everything you can and that’s awesome. You can’t spell for beans, but you come by that naturally so I don’t judge you.

6 months old

6 months old

You have the same best friend from last year, but you two aren’t exclusive any more. It’s fun to see you expand your horizons beyond Scorch and LT (as awesome as she is). You’re still very quiet when you’re not 100% sure of your setting, but you’re getting bolder and more comfortable speaking up and being noticed outside of our family. It makes me laugh when people tell me how quiet you are though because when I think you of, quiet is one of the last words that comes to mind. You don’t talk nearly as much as your brother (who does?!), but when you do speak up you usually have something important (to you) to say. Mind you, that something important could be to tell us how dumb we are, but that’s just you.

To celebrate your birthday we went to get pedicures and out to dinner while Dad and Scorch were at lacrosse. We had so much fun. Until you didn’t get your way, and then you sobbed. But again, that’s just you. You like to be in control and rain down the fires of hell when you’re not. You’ve gotten a ton better about this as you’ve gotten older which is really nice. You need to learn to bend, little girl, just not too much. There is *nothing* wrong with knowing what you want to pursue even if no one else is on board. Right now there are so many times I wish you’d just go with the flow, but I try to remind myself daily that I don’t want to break you of this because it’ll be a huge asset as you grow.

We leave to go camping later this summer and I can’t wait. Which is odd because last year’s camping trip was flat out the worst trip we’ve ever taken as a family. Dad was sick, the weather was horrible and your behavior was off-the-charts bad. But the joy of family is knowing that even when you are a monster, we still love you. We may not like each other all the time, but we always love each other. And, girlfriend, do I ever love you. You are *everything* I dreamed about when I thought about having a daughter. You’re funny and sweet and loving and sassy and strong. You’re learning how to be a magnificent friend and discovering how much fun learning is. You’ve got your own sense of self when it comes to what you like and what you don’t and you make no apologies for it.

Isn't she lovely?

Isn’t she lovely?

Raising a girl in this world scares me silly. There is so much pressure and so many worries. I know a lot of these things apply to boys too, but with girls it just seems magnified. So please, please keep loving who are you. Remember that your father and I aren’t idiots (most of the time). Know that you’re adored no matter what. Keep being kind to others and yourself. Know that your two feet and your amazing brain is all you need to get where you want to go. You are worthy of love and kindness and all the good things the world has to offer- so expect those things. And when you don’t get them, figure out what went wrong and do better next time. You aren’t perfect and there is always so much to learn so don’t hesitate to ask for help. Wash your face, brush your teeth and use your manners in every situation.

And always, always, always know you’re loved.

Happy birthday, baby girl!

Love,
Mom

May6

Snippits

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Ah- baseball season. That time of year where we’re lucky if we have one night every two weeks free from practice or games. It’s fun, but so freaking exhausting. Which is why I’m posting snippets from my week today- I don’t have the brain power for anything more.

Church

Scorch made his 1st Communion this past weekend. It was a beautiful ceremony full of 8 year old dressed in their finest trying not to giggle (then gag) over the fact that they could drink wine. We were lucky to have all 3 sets of Scorch’s grandparents and one uncle up for the day to celebrate with us and to ohhh and ahh over my kid. Scorch’s wardrobe outside of school consists of high-water sweatpants and t-shirts so seeing him in a full suit was a treat!

~*~*~

I was outside this weekend vacuuming out the car and when I walked in the house, Scorch is yelling for me that something is wrong with the Bean. I run up the stairs to find her sitting on a chair, sobbing in agony without making a sound. I start to panic trying to figure out what’s going on…to find out there is a bee on her. A teeny-tiny baby honey-bee on her leg.

I thought something was eating her flesh.

Not THE bee- just a pic of a bee I took a few summer ago.

Not THE bee- just a pic of a bee I took a few summer ago.

I removed the bee without her getting stung, but she was DONE for the day. She literally wouldn’t go into a room in our house for two days without me/the Hubs/Scorch searching the room for stealth bees. Poor chick. She’s so lucky I feel so badly for her other wise I’d really enjoy tormenting her.

~*~*~

Scorch’s birthday is coming up, so Sunday we took 10 8 year old boys to an entertainment center for 3 hours. First we sugared them up with pizza, soda and cake, then we let them run wild and play two games of laser tag. Then we gave them each a handful of tokens in the arcade. THEN those who wanted to could get harnessed up and walk a ropes course 3 stories off the ground.

Ropescourse

So much fun, so glad I never have to do that again. 10 8-year olds are exhausting.

 

Apr24

Dr. Mom

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This morning Bean woke up and was fine…until we got in the car and then she started crying about not wanting to go to camp (the kiddos are on spring break and are going to a local day camp). She had cried at drop off on Tuesday, so I figured this was her way trying to get out of it. When we got to camp she told me she didn’t feel good- her throat hurt and her tummy hurt. I continued to think she was faking it, so I tried every trick I had to get her to go. I even pulled out the Big Guns. She and I were supposed to go to VA to visit Red and my brand new baby nephew- something she has been looking forward to all week. When I told her if she was really sick we couldn’t go, she still didn’t budge. She didn’t feel good and that was that.

At this point, I was so freaking annoyed- I had so much to do today and most of it would have gotten done a lot quicker in the office.  But I gave in and decided to work from home and keep her with me just in case (thank you new job for that flexibility!). Still in a snit, I decided we’d make a quick trip to the grocery store to stock up on supplies for the guys for this weekend.  We pulled into the parking lot and she’s moving slower then I thought was possible so I’m trying (not so patiently) to get her to move her hiney.  The poor bug finally hopped out of the car and promptly threw up in the parking lot.

Huh, I guess she wasn’t faking after all.

It’s a darn good thing we had our bathroom remodeled because this is where she spent a good 3 hours today:

SickBean

Mother of the Year material right there.

And when we got out of the car she promptly puked in the parking lot.

Feb25

To New Routines

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Well, it looks like the folks I interviewed with who saw my blog didn’t think talking to a psychic was too odd because they offered me the job and I accepted! Starting the first week in March I’ll be back to working full time for 1 employer and I couldn’t be more thrilled! Things fell very quickly into place with this job and it just feels right- let’s hope my gut is leading me on the right path.

~*~*~

The kids went back to school yesterday after a week long February break. Why do we have a February break when we also have a week long April break, you ask? To make parents crazy. That is the only answer I could come up with that made any sense.  While honestly we had a great break, the stress of trying to work, juggle playdates and keep my household somewhat functioning almost broke me.  I was beyond thankful for 1) our babysitter that give me 9 hours out of the house, 2) friends who graciously took my kids for playdates and let me take their kids in return to occupy my kids and 3) kids that get along very, very well 90% of the time.

The other 10% of the time gave the Bean a really good excuse to try to spell out a new sign for her bedroom door:

unnamed

Translation: Scorch is not allowed in my bedroom

I give her mad props for the freaky smiley face, but the fact that she thought “Barm” = bedroom makes me wonder why we’re spending money on a private school education.

~*~*~*

Next week starts a new normal as I’m back in an office full time. After a few weeks, I’ll be spending the majority of my time working from home, but these next 3 weeks will be the first time ever that both the Hubs and I will be working outside the house 40 hours a week. I foresee lots of scrambling, breakfasts for dinner and a messy house. But I also see two kids thrilled they can go to after school again (after school = play time), a wife (me!) feeling like she’s pulling her weight again and a job I can’t wait to sink my teeth into.

So here’s to new routines, new normals and a fresh start!

Jan29

It’s Different the Second Time Around

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When we were younger, my sister and I used to complain/joke that my brother got treated differently than we did. He was the baby (almost 7 years younger then me and 5 years younger then my sister) and the only boy so sometimes the rules just didn’t seem to apply to him the same way they did to us girls. Whether that’s true or not, that’s how it felt and even though Red and I were too old to care that much, we still make sure to point out any injustices to my parents immediately.

~*~*~*~

When the kids are in Pre-K through Kindergarten, they have a Leader Day each month.  And on their Leader Day, the kids are required to bring in a snack for the whole class. Snack is typically in the morning around 10ish and nothing- nothing- got me more fired up when Scorch was little than unhealthy snacks. Who in their right mind would send in Oreos to a classroom full of itty bitty kids to eat at 10 am?! Seriously- how hard is it to go out and get some fruit or muffins or crackers and cheese to at least give the impression that you are striving towards healthy food??

~*~*~*~

I have a cold. The Bean has a cold.  We were both up for over an hour in the middle of the night as she tried to get back to sleep so we’re both exhausted right now. Between work, school, running errands and getting Scorch to lacrosse practice, we had all of 5 minutes to dart into the grocery store to pick out a snack for her Leader Day tomorrow.

Which is why my kid is bringing in Rice Krispie Treats for the class tomorrow.

Blame it on my cold. Blame it on the fact that the Bean is my 2nd kid and I’m tired. But just don’t interrupt me as I enjoy a pre-packaged sugar bomb that I’m blessing a class of 25 kids with tomorrow!

Jan14

The Bean Life

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Oh this child. I was just going to wax poetically about how awesome she is. Funny and smart and scary quick. About how we can spend  hours playing Uno and laugh until we cry. About how you never, ever have any idea what she’s going to do next- like dress up like a super hero and stop in her travels to love up on the cat as we finally packed away Christmas 2013.

Bean_Maddie

But then she just fought me like a demon about going to bed (I’m so hungry. I’m thirty. Sit in my bedroom. You’re the Meanest Mom EVER). Life with the Bean is so many things, but it’s never boring.  She makes me stronger and better and quicker- more loving and enthusiastic and patient. And tired- so very tired. And I wouldn’t trade her for anything 99.9% of the time!

Dec16

Flying Solo with Santa

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Continuing on my “Sunrise, Sunset” theme of the week, we took the kids to go see Santa tonight. At first, Beaner was not having it- at all. She said she’d give Santa her list and talk to him but she wasn’t sitting on his lap or taking a picture with him. No way, no how. Given that this isn’t my first time around this particular block, I put on a festive sweater and touched up my makeup knowing darn well I was going to have to get in the picture with the kids to make it happen.

There was a small line ahead of us, including this adorable 10 month old. Her parents had her decked out in this gorgeous dress and big old bow. She couldn’t stop smiling and waving at Santa while we were in line, and the kids asked if they were that excited to see Santa when they were little. So the Hubs and I started to tell the kids about all our trips to see Santa over the years. About how Scorch would get all serious and scowl and the Bean would cry and cry the minute she was put on the big guy’s lap.  We took bets on what the little girl in front of us would do- the kids thought she’d do fine and I knew she’d lose her mind the minute her mom walked away. And that’s just what she did- the poor thing couldn’t get away from Santa fast enough as all of us in line giggled over her.

Once she was done, it was the moment of truth. Scorch was geared up and ready to go- but Beaner was the big question mark. I took off my jacket to hop in the picture with them, when Beaner let go of my hand, climbed up on Santa’s lap and told me they were fine without me.  And they were.  For the first time in 7 years, my kids took a picture with Santa without me in it because they didn’t need me in it for reassurance and comfort.

3 hours later and I’m still not sure what I think about that.

Dec3

Here Comes Santa Claus…

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So we survived the crazy! Thanksgiving was lovely and fun and delicious- just the way Thanksgiving should be.  And the wedding- oh, the wedding. It was gorgeous and loving and joyous. As an extra bonus, the kids rocked it! I admit, I was nervous- so scared that they’d freeze at the start of the aisle once they saw all the people, but they didn’t. Scorch came down first all by himself looking so handsome in his suit, then the girls (Bean & Lala) followed, dropping petals as they went.  When they got to the end of aisle, the girls just stood there, refusing to sit down until they got rid of every petal in their baskets. Trust me, it was too cute for words! If you know of anyone getting married, we could be convinced to hire them out!

~*~*~*~*~

Two days after the wedding, we officially slid into the Christmas season and got our tree. Mind you, it’s not decorated yet, but it’s up and our Elf on the Shelf, Buddy, is back. That counts for something, right? Our first night was a success- we moved the Elf like a boss. Second night? Ummm…we forgot. The kids got a harsh lesson in the fact that Buddy doesn’t move if they are bad- which they surely must have been if he didn’t move, right? Yup- we win at parenting.

I have started Christmas shopping thanks to the kid’s oh-so-helpful list. Scorch asked for (in no particular order) an iPad, and iPod, a Kindle Fire and and Nook HD.  And the Bean asked for handcuffs. Oddly enough, neither list is helpful or surprising!

Nov4

Are You There God, It’s Me…

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You know how before you had your kids, you totally knew what kind of parent you were going to be? I knew, for example, that I was going to be that mom that was cool and laid back about all my kids questions. No matter what the subject, I was going to answer my kids honestly and openly and create a really good dialogue so my kids felt listened to and were well educated.

Yeah. Then I had kids and now I lie to them all the time because MY GOD- what did you just ask me?!

My kids have skirted around the issue of where babies come from. So far most of their questions about baby making have been so vague I can easily avoid giving them the (age appropriate) details.  However, they do know how babies are born– a process which Bean thinks is disgusting and awful. So I shouldn’t have been surprised the other day when she asked me how a lady could make sure she didn’t have a baby.

I admit- I froze. What in the holy hell do I tell her? She doesn’t know where babies come from, so obviously discussions about abstinence and birth control weren’t even remotely possible. So I did what I do best- I lied. I told her that if a lady doesn’t want to have a baby, she just has to tell God 3 times very seriously that she doesn’t want to be a mom and God will take care of the rest.

Her response? “Well, I’m going to tell God 100 times that I don’t want want to be a mom because I really don’t want to have a kid. Ever.”I’ve heard her whispering her prayer every single night, reminding God that she doesn’t want to be a mom.

My kids are so screwed having me as their primary source of information, aren’t they?!

~*~*~

In all seriousness- anyone know of any good birds and the bees books I can have on hand for when I have to actually share the truth with the kids?