Category Archives: Bean

Nov3

This, That & a Minor Miracle

Posted on November 3, 2013 by Heather

When I thought about being unemployed one of the things that freaked me out the most was thinking I’d have eons of free time to fill up. I could very easily go the way of the sloth and do nothing but read all day and I was worried that I’d do just that. Turns out, I have nothing to worry about because so far I’m finding being unemployed has made my schedule a 1000x crazier then it was before. Before, I had a set schedule that varied little from day to day. I knew what I was doing at any given hour during the day and there was comfort in that routine. Now there is no routine and I’m flying by the seat of my pants, yet my days are booked between meetings about freelance work, PTA meetings, meetings with my CPA, meeting with a financial adviser about what to do with my 401K and random interviews. And when I’m not doing that, I’m cleaning my house- only to have the kids wreck it in 0.007 seconds after they get home.

And frankly this lack of a routine is making me crazy.

This is the week I start my part time job, find out more about one of the freelance jobs I’m doing and find out if I got a full time job I interviewed for last week. So by the end of this week I’ll have some idea of what my new schedule will be even if it kills me, so help me God.

~*~*~*~

Halloween this year was amazing. Good lord, as crazy as 5 and 7 can make me, they are the best ages in so many ways. This year my kids were beyond excited about Halloween- they both completely got into the spirit and were old enough not to be exhausted and miserable by the end of the night. We went to a friends house for dinner, then 6 couples with 13 kids total hit the road and did the trick or treating thing. The oldest kids were 7, the youngest was 13 months old and they all rocked it with a lot of laughs, good manners and down right giddiness over the good candy. Scorch was Harry Potter and the Bean was the Red Power Ranger and part of me wanted to freeze them right then and there at this age so they’ll always be this happy and excited.

~*~*~*~

Scorch had his first sleepover at a friends house this past weekend. I admit, I was nervous that I was going to have to head out at 11 pm to pick him up. He was at one of my best friend’s homes with people who love him dearly and he knows well, but still, I didn’t think he’d last the night. When I went to bed, I had both phones right by my pillow so I could grab them when the phone call inevitably came during the night.

But it never came- the sleepover was a complete success!

Such a small thing in the grand scheme of things, but a HUGE testament to how far Scorch has come. If you had told me 2 years ago when Scorch’s anxiety started that he’d spend the night somewhere other then our house or his grandparents, I would have called you crazy. We were lucky enough to get that child to sleep in his own house at that point in time- and when we did, sleep typically happened after hours of trying and usually didn’t last all night thanks to nightmares. Yet here he was, spending the night at a friends without any issues. I’ve said it once and I’ll say it again- getting Scorch therapy was *the* best thing we’ve ever done for him and watching him live a completely normal, ordinary life as a result is a miracle.

Oct27

Life with the Bean

Posted on October 27, 2013 by Heather

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Life with the Bean has been a bit more challenging than usual lately. That child has always known her own mind and has never been shy about voicing her thoughts – even when those thoughts are better left in her head. Fun thoughts like “I wish I had a different Mom” and “You’re the worst brother EVER!”. Obviously there are consequences and we repeat ad nauseam “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.” But really, holding her tongue is something that’s only going to come with age and maturity.

As madding as it can be, sometime that child comes out with a gem.

Earlier today the Hubs realized that the railing on our stairs was loose because our little monkeys like to hang from it. So he came upstairs where we were reading and says to the kids, “If this railing falls out of the wall because you two keep hanging from it, I’m going make you sleep outside with the animals!”

Beaner looks up from her book, calmly says “That’s a consequence I can live with. I love animals.” and kept on reading.

The Hubs had to go outside to stop from laughing in her face.

She may drive me to drink, but I adore that kid.

Sep23

Leader Day Sharing

Posted on September 23, 2013 by Heather

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Today was the Bean’s Leader Day. If you don’t speak Kindergarten-ese, when it’s your Leader Day it’s The Best Thing EVER. Not only do you get to be the line leader all day, you also get to bring in snack AND something for Show & Tell. The only requirement for Show & Tell is that what ever you bring in can’t be a toy- it’s got to be something the kids can discuss and share. So we’ve been talking all weekend about how the Bean was going to bring in a picture of her and Scorch tubing (being pulled in a tube behind a speed boat) for the first time this summer. It’s basically my most favorite picture of the kids from the summer because they are radiating pure glee in it and I was excited she was going to share it.

This is obviously not the tubing picture, but it’s from that day and it makes me laugh!

So we talked all this morning about what she was going to share about the picture. How it was taken at her grandfather’s cottage. How she thought she and Scorch were going to sink when the boat stopped pulling them. How the Hubs tried multiple times to pull himself up to water ski on one ski and just couldn’t do it. I made sure she was prepped with a lot to share about this picture!

Also from that same day- Scorch getting a lay of the land!

So when I went to pick up the kids this afternoon, I was bubbling over with excitement – I could not wait to hear how the Bean’s Leader Day went! She piled into the car and I asked her what she shared about her picture.

That we bought it at Wal-Mart.

What?

I told them about how you took us to Wal-Mart so you could get the picture.

(That’s absolutely correct- I needed to print the pic out in a hurry, so I did 1 hour photo processing at Wal-Mart. But really??) Did you tell them where you were? How much fun you had? How fast we went?

Nope, I just told everyone we got the picture at Wal-Mart.

I don’t know why I expected any different!

Sep17

Boring & extraordinary

Posted on September 17, 2013 by Heather

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So lately my life has neither been wicked or crazy, although it has been slightly awesome in that nothing-has-broken-no-one-has-died sorta way. This past week has just been exhausting as we settle back into our new normal of school and basketball and swim lessons and homework and fall temperatures and birthday parties. All of which are good, good things- they just all hit at once.

Scorch continues to love school with a fiery passion and is as happy as a lark to get out of bed each morning and get going! The Bean, on the other hand, needs to be dragged out of bed most mornings and usually starts crying about going to school right around the time we pull into the parking lot. In case you were wondering, it is loads of fun to drag a crying 5 year old across a parking lot, across the street and into her classroom every day, thank you very much. *sigh* Thankfully she’s fine 2 minute after we leave (I peek in on her most mornings) and each afternoon when I got to pick her up, she runs away from me because she wants to stay and play.

We are trying to eek out every ray of sunshine and speck of warmth that we can from Mother Nature because fall is quickly approaching, with winter waiting in the wings. While I miss the sun being up when I leave the house early every morning, for 2 weeks I was treated to the most gorgeous sunrises on my way home from the gym. I was pulling over every single morning just to capture the pink skies on my phone because they were awe-inspiring. I mean, have you ever..?!

I haven’t read a really compelling book in a long time. I’m in the middle of Dan Brown’s Inferno but right now I’m annoyed / depressed by it. Annoyed because in the copy I have from the library, random words/passages are bolded for emphasis by the author/publisher. If I’m not smart enough to place my own emphasis while reading, well then, I have no business reading at all. And depressed because the book talks at length about how the world is going to hell in a hand basket due to over population sooner rather than later. Not exactly bedtime reading material. Next on my to-read list is The Girl You Left Behind by Jojo Moyes, so here’s hoping that’s better. I have, however, managed to watch both seasons of Scandal in the past 3 weeks. Make of that what you will. 😉

So, that’s the state of us and our average, normal, extraordinary life! How’s your life?

Sep8

Shhhhhhh!

Posted on September 8, 2013 by Heather

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There are many, many times I look at the Bean and wonder where she came from. That child may be the spitting image of me as a kid, but when it comes to her personality, we’re opposite in a lot of ways. That’s not at all a bad thing, but it is a mystifying thing as I try to figure out how to be the best mom I can to her. I mean, the little bugger doesn’t even like ice cream – a food I would live on, if allowed. Who doesn’t like ice cream, for crying out loud?!

Friday was the Bean’s second day of Kindergarten and I was dreading it. I knew the first day would go fine because of all the excitement- but the second day is when my kids tend to realize this is for real and, in years past, haven’t taken well to that realization. So I was prepared for tears and heel-dragging that morning, but the Bean surprised me and went to school with minimal protest. I held my breath as we walked into the classroom, waiting for the meltdown I was sure that was coming. Hmmm….so far so good. Then we went to sit her at her table and found out her seat had been moved after 1 day in the classroom.

I started laughing to myself because I knew exactly why my child was moved. Her seat on the first day of school was at the same long table as her best friend. The table was rectangular and the Bean and her friend each sat at the heads of the table, with three kids between them. When I saw that the first morning, I thought it was perfect placement. I figured the girls were close enough to draw support from each other, but not close enough to talk to each other all day long. I figured wrong. Evidently they spent the whole first day trying “whisper” to each other over the head’s of their classmates. So my kid got (rightly) moved for talking too much.

Finally, proof that my kid is my kid in spirit as well as body!

So far, Scorch thinks that 2nd grade is the Best. Thing. Ever if for no other reason than they have their own desks instead of sitting at a table. Who knew something like that would be so thrilling to 7 year olds? He’s already had two spelling tests- which he thinks is awesome too! There is absolutely no doubt who that kid’s mother is! Here’s hoping Week 2 goes just as great as Week 1!

Sep4

Girls

Posted on September 4, 2013 by Heather

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So…back to school. Scorch started today and Beaner starts tomorrow (which is good since, you know, stomach bug). The Bean was feeling better today, so we did go and drop off her supplies to her classroom. While she was doing a quick project, I made small talk with her teacher. In the midst of our conversation, it came out that out of the 26 kids in the Bean’s class, 19 of them were girls.

As the Bean’s teacher was telling me this her nose crinkled as she wore that universal look of “Whoo boy.” And I found myself mimicking her- frankly upset that the Bean was going to have to be around all that estrogen. Ugh. The drama. Girls- they are sort of the worst, aren’t they? That’s why I moved the Bean to a boy-heavy class last year, you know?

And then I caught myself. Because I’m a girl. And I’m kind of awesome. And so is my Mom. And my sister. And the rest of my relatives. And my female friends- some of whom I’ve had since 3rd grade. So why all the girl hate? Because that- that is the worst.

Some of it may because the only true female friendship the Bean’s had over the past few years that I’ve seen up close has been full all the drama and yelling and tears that you dread. Each and every get together ends with me sitting both girls down, making them hold hands and explaining to them how friendship works- then they are good for a while, and back at it again. It astounds me how vicious they can be to each other with their words. It’s both maddening and sad and I find myself holding my breath the whole time they’re together.

It may be because the vast majority of the kids I spend time with, outside of the Bean, are boys. Scorch, his friends, my nephews- they’ve all become the Bean’s friends and she often time prefers hanging out with them than the girls. I’m not raising a girly-girl- she’s much more apt to play Star Wars and Harry Potter than she is My Little Pony or Barbies. I’m not saying that boys are easy all the time- but they seems to be easier thus far than girls in my limited experience.

But whatever the reason, I’m over it.

I’m over the fretting and worrying and the wrinkling of my nose. Because girls ARE awesome and this is going to be the year Bean embraces that. I’m so thankful that she has so many amazing role models in her life- male and female- that she and Scorch can pattern after. I’m so glad that I have family and friends close by so she can see how friendship works. How we listen to and respect each other. How we settle our difference and talk things through and how we never have to resort to meanness. The girl’s Bean has class with are the kids she’ll be stuck with until at least 6th grade so even if they all don’t become BFFs and sing Justin Bieber songs together, she is going to be kinds and respectful even if it kills me.

I wish my kids a lot of things, but at the top of that list is always the friendships I’ve been lucky to have. And I know for the Bean some of them will start tomorrow on her first day of Kindergarten.

Aug27

Players

Posted on August 27, 2013 by Heather

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The kids and I often play 20 Questions in the car. Usually it’s me thinking of something and them having to ask me questions to figure out what animal/object/sport/toy/whatever I’m thinking of. I don’t mind this at all – anything that keeps the kids from bickering over what to listen to in the car is a win in my book.

Today the Bean decided she wanted to come up with something we could guess. Normally when it’s her turn, she picks one of two things (cat or dolphin) so it’s not much of a challenge. But today, she stumped us.

> Does it have fur?
No

> Does it have 4 legs?
No

> Does it have any legs?
No

> Does it live in the ocean?
Yes

> Is it a dolphin?
No.

> (hmmmm) Does it swim?
Yes

> Is it a fish/shark/octopus/squid/sting ray/crab/lobster?
No

> Bean, I give up. We need a hint. (please remember, the child is 5, she doesn’t know that many marine animals)
Ok- it’s either an octopus or a kangaroo.

> An octopus! (never mind that we already guessed that)
Nope, a kangaroo!

Clearly, that child needs to go back to school ASAP because she has lost her mind.

~*~*~*

In other gaming news, Scorch has developed a Pokemon obsession over the past few weeks. Heaven help me, I will not be responsible for my actions if I have to play another Pokemon game EVER.

Aug7

The Pill Pusher

Posted on August 7, 2013 by Heather

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Guess who has two thumbs and a husband with the flu AND mono?

This girl!

Yeah- it’s been a fun week here at the Heat Household. Monday morning both Scorch and I woke up with a cold. The doctor had told the Hubs when he was diagnosed with the flu last week that if anyone developed flu or cold symptoms, to call the doctor immediately. So I did what any (lazy, procrastinating) parent would do and waited 24 hours to see if the symptoms would go away or turn out to be allergies. Tuesday came around and I was 1000x worse, Scorch was the same and Beaner was saying her throat hurt. I called both my doctor and the kid’s pediatrician and both said they wanted all of us on Tamiflu immediately.

Hmm…ok. No blood test? Nothing? Nope- just straight to medication. I was a little leery of this, but honestly after seeing how sick the Hubs was/is, I felt it was better to be safe than sorry and risk ruining the rest of our summer.

So now guess who has two thumbs and insurance that has a $250 deductible per person for name brand prescription medication? Yup..this girl! And now guess which $100+ medication doesn’t have a generic counterpart? Yup… Tamiflu! And guess which medication, in liquid form, is said to be so disgusting that it’s made many friend’s kids puke upon taking it? Yup…Tamiflu again! So after some discussions with our pediatrician, I got the medication in pill form for both kids.

Now, my fights with the Bean over taking medication is legendary in my family. Or, maybe just in my own head- but either way, getting her to take meds in the past has been a nightmare. So now not only do I have to get her to take meds, I have to teach her how to swallow a pill. Scorch, bless his heart, already knows how, so last night he and I were talking up how easy it was to swallow pills, how it doesn’t taste like anything, how quick it was and on and on and on. When the magic hour arrived, Scorch showed Bean how to do it, narrating every single step. Then it was time for Bean to give it a shot. And she DID IT!

We all danced around the kitchen like freaking loons celebrating because you guys, my five year old can swallow pills!!!! Do you know how much easier and neater my life just became?!?! I have never once felt so successful as a parent! The only downside is the Bean wants to take pills all the time now- so trying to convince her she can only take her medication once a day has become my new full time job.

Aug1

I’ve Had Better

Posted on August 1, 2013 by Heather

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We just returned from our annual camping trip. I really wish I could tell you it was as relaxing as years past, but frankly, this was the worst trip we’ve had in as long as I can remember.

First, there was the weather. Hello rain and cold temperatures- you’re not welcome this week. We arrived on Saturday to the camp ground and within an hour, it started to rain. And it didn’t stop until 4 pm on Sunday. While we do have a pop-up camper, you still have to get out in the rain to walk to the bathrooms, get food, talk to others, etc. So we spent Sunday at a local (30 minutes away) mall seeing a movie and wandering around. Thankfully that night was gorgeous, so we were able to go back, have dinner and a much needed campfire. Monday was lovely, but cold so we drove an hour to this cute touristy town full of great bars and adorable shops. You know- just the things a 5 and 7 year old want to spend their days doing. Thankfully there was also a 2 hour boat ride to help pass the day along.

Tuesday afternoon and Wednesday were picture perfect beach days so we did get to soak up some sun and relax. But the weather was supposed to take another nasty turn Wednesday night, so we packed it in after a day at the beach and headed home 2 days early. That about broke my heart, but there is a very limited number of things to do when the weather is bad and we did ’em all.

The second strike against our trip was the Bean. Or more specifically the Bean and her mighty attitude. Her sass turned to down right rudeness and for the first 2 days of our trip I really wondered if I gave birth to the spawn of Satan. She was rude, she was demanding and she made me feel like the biggest parental failure on the earth. Thankfully after Day 2 (and countless time outs, loss of privileges and discussions), she came back around to her normal self.

And lastly, my husband. Last week before we left on vacation, he went to the doctors because he thought he had strep throat. That was negative, but he didn’t feel much better before we left. He was a *trooper* on vacation- taking turns getting up with the kids, taking them fishing, playing kickball/baseball/lacrosse- but he clearly didn’t feel good. We got home around 8:30 last night and he was back at the walk-in at 9:15. Turns out the poor guy has Influenza-B. In July. While we’re on vacation. Only him! Here’s hoping the meds kick in soon.

All that said, the trip was not a complete bust. The kids had a awesome time, despite the weather. We had a great time with the kids making fun memories on the boat ride and on our first fishing expeditions. We laughed until I cried around the camp fire at night telling stories and reconnecting with the family and old friends camping with us. The days at the beach that we did have were gorgeous- pure sun shine, clean water, gentle waves. We ate like kings and I had a blast watching my kids get more self-confident and self-assured navigating their way through camp site life. We started to teach Scorch how to ride his bike without his training wheels and I taught both kids how to play a mean hand of Uno. The bad never outweighs the good- I mean, we were on vacation and that can’t suck no matter how hard it tries- but I can’t wait for our do-over next year!

Jul23

Things I Wonder About

Posted on July 23, 2013 by Heather

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Today, thankfully, nothing has broken, been peed/puked/pooped upon and/or ruined. I’m calling that a success! The good thing about horrible days is that they set the bar so low that anything seems great in comparison.

I have a lot on my brain, but none of it substantial enough to make up a blog post (I know, right? When has that every stopped me?!) so today you get snippets:

> Is This My Life: A few weeks back, Scorch was taking part in two different sports during the same week. That meant that I washed that boy’s sport-specific socks and jock strap every. single. night. I kept telling myself as annoying as it was, it was just a week. But then in dawned on me- it may be a week now, but in a few years, that’ll basically be my life when Scorch starts playing school sports. *sob*

> Is This My Life, Part II: Scorch got an MP3 player this past week as a belated birthday gift from some awesome family friends. He loves it- we downloaded about 20 songs on it and 3 approved Harry Potter videos and he’s in heaven. The downside? He’s got those stinking headphones plugged into his ears all the time- so I’m talking to him or trying to get his attention and he cannot hear me. It’s maddening, so we’ve had to set limits on the thing. This is a fight we’ll be fighting from now until Scorch moves out. When did my 7 year old morph into a teenager?

> Puppy Love: We celebrated the Bean’s birthday this past weekend and one of her oldest friends brought her a bouquet of flowers he picked for her out of his garden. He showed up with his hair combed just so, holding those flowers out and in search of my little girl to give them to. You want to see a bunch of adults melt into big piles of goo? Just watch them watch true puppy love in action- it’s adorable.

> Nosy Neighbors: As I bellowed at my kids while standing in front of an open window, telling them to go to bed for the 1 millionth time tonight, I wondered if my neighbors can hear me. And I wonder if they judge me. I really hope not because they don’t see them 10 minute ramp up to me losing my cool or the 20 minute bedtime routine before that. One of our neighbors have kids of their own, so I’m sure they at least can sympathize (unless they, or their children, are saints) but the other couple is a childless older couple. I have no idea if they like kids, if they come from big families or if they get the craziness that is bedtime- but I sure hope their only impress of me isn’t as the crazy, screaming mom. Because that would stink.

> The Full Monty: To celebrate my birthday, the Hubs took me to see The Full Monty at a local theater. For the record, this isn’t something the Hubs would ever agree to had I not pulled The Birthday Trump Card on him. He’s not a fan of theater in general, but especially not of musicals about men learning to strip in particular. But the Birthday Wish wins, so we went. And we loved it. It was so well done, so funny and so enjoyable that I’m flat out disappointed it took us 12 years of living in our town to discover this gem of a theater. So here’s to getting older and expanding horizons!